THE 10 COMMITMENTS: Parenting with Purpose

by Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller

The 10 Commitments.

Hardback book, 165 pages ($19.95)
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“Moorman and Haller have given us a great gift in The 10 Commitments, an uplifting tribute to raising children.”

Jim Fay
Author of Parenting with Love and Logic
Love and Logic® Institute, Inc.
Golden, CO

“In The 10 Commitments, Moorman and Haller have led us beyond parenting with consequences and discipline and into parenting that nourishes a child’s spirit.”

Elisa Medhus
Author of Hearing Is Believing

"The 10 Commitments is an inspirational blend of love, guidance, and instruction for the whole family. It will help you connect to your children soul to soul."

Jack Canfield
Co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul® Series
Santa Barbara, CA

The First Commitment

I commit to remembering that experience can be messy.

I accept that sand, mud, food, paint, cooking, eating, relationships, emotions, and social interactions can be messy. I allow my children to learn from making messes and the cleanup that follows. I recognize that experience can be messy.

The Second Commitment

I commit to creating a culture of accountability in my family.

I hold my children accountable for their actions and choices with gentleness and love. I implement consequences consistently and allow my children to experience the related, respectful, reality-based consequences that flow naturally from their actions. I create a culture of accountability.

The Third Commitment

I commit to suspending judgment.

I create an atmosphere in which mistakes are seen as learning experiences and valued for the lessons they bring. I perceive my children's choices as either appropriate or as opportunities for learning and development. I do not make my children wrong for their choices, even as I hold them accountable for their actions. I suspend judgment.

The Fourth Commitment

I commit to managing my mind first.

I realize that how I approach a situation affects the outcome and that I alone control my approach. I attend to and manage my frame of mind before I approach my children. I move UP in my consciousness before I move IN with action. I manage my mind first.

The Fifth Commitment

I commit to focusing on the search for solutions.

I realize that fixing the problem is more important than fixing blame. I pledge to invest my time and effort in seeking solutions rather than in blame and punishment. I search for solutions.

The Sixth Commitment

I commit to speaking self-responsible language.

My language patterns reflect my belief in autonomy, personal responsibility, and ownership of one's actions and feelings. I learn and use language that helps my children see themselves as cause. I speak self-responsible language.

The Seventh Commitment

I commit to helping my children develop their inner authority.

I recognize that an inner authority is the only authority my children will take with them everywhere they go. To that end, I strive to make myself dispensable and to assist them in becoming increasingly in charge of themselves and their own lives. I help my children develop their inner authority.

The Eighth Commitment

I commit to modeling the message.

I recognize that attitudes are more easily caught than taught. I know that children pay more attention to what I do than to what I say. I walk my talk. I become the message I want to deliver to my children. I model the message.

The Ninth Commitment

I commit to seeing my child as teacher.

I recognize that my children are in my life as much so I can learn from them as they are so they can learn from me. I am open to the lessons my children offer me and honor them for helping me learn and grow. I see my child as teacher.

The Tenth Commitment

I commit to creating a sense of oneness in my family.

I am present for my children, helping them develop roots and feelings of belonging. I treat my children with love and caring. I create a sense of oneness in my family.

© 2005 Healings Minds Institute and Institute for Personal Power. All right reserved. Written permission must be obtained from Thomas Haller and Chick Moorman to copy or use any of this material.